One of the biggest blessings that I have taken from journaling, since i started several years ago, has been the ability to witness myself in my growth cycles…
through the changes, the ups, downs and—perhaps most profound—the quantum leaps that is our ever shifting perspective and truth.
When we are first discovering some aspect of ourselves we want to develop, or we first come upon something we want to make a part of our life, it is still outside of our current way of being, not yet integrated.
We see it, and then we see ourselves, outside of it—from this place we can both see the promise and benefit of whats to come, as well as understand why we are where we currently stand.
It’s a beautiful place because it both anticipates the new and relates to what will soon expire.
These transitionary periods are valuable, delicate and shifting. Its these times that I am most grateful to have journaled and recorded my thoughts of the moments. Forever encapsulated is my why, my reasoning, my pain, terror, joy…whatever was there for me.
Why is this valuable?
Because there comes a day where we—having strived to be more or different in some way—suddenly make the shift. We tip the scale. It feels quantum; its as if we were just one place and suddenly BAM, we find ourselves with a different perspective.
Once we make that quantum leap, we are no longer where we were, yet the nature of such a shift lacks a path that we can trace backwards to our old way of being or viewing the world. As we walked towards the change, the path was in sight but once we make “the leap”, it fades.
And that disappearing understanding, that fading ability to relate to what we once were, makes me uneasy.
Have you ever changed something about yourself—lets say, for a simple example: you decide to no longer eat fast food.
At some point, perhaps driving by a fast food restaurant, you’re stunned and bewildered that so many people still eat there—by choice!
Its not like you didn’t used to, and when you did there was nothing wrong with it in your mind. But now, you can find no trace of your previous way of life, and can’t even fathom the idea of that seemingly far-gone life.
This has proven true in each step forward I have taken on my path, although I know that each place I left behind was serving me for some reason at the time, it slips out of my reach!
This is where journalling—or whatever means you resonate with to express and capture where you were—comes in. I can crack open a journal and flip through the phases and cycles and quantum leaps of my life.
When I stumble on some period I can no longer identify with, there, in my writing are notes that, though cryptic to others instantly remind me of that state of being. “Ah yes” I am reminded of where I was in time and space, and it is comfort.
I need that, it keeps me grounded. It humbles me and shows me the true length of the road I have walked. In the present it is so easy to romance, demonize, or downplay where we’ve come from!
Keeping track of ourselves also makes it easier for us to relate to different ways of being, it affirms that we are all always changing and shifting and new…but underneath it all, we are all after a common goal.
I believe that in owning and relating to myself in this way, I open my ability to relate to the differences in the world.
Knowing where you have come from is as important as knowing where you are going.
No one is free from being creative, it is an inherent piece of each of us. What way do you have that you can follow yourself along your path? Is it writing? Video? Painting? Scrapbooking?