I was reading Marsha Sinetar’s book, Do What You Love and the Money Will Follow, and came across a startling point:
we punish ourselves while thinking that we are rewarding ourselves.
This resonated with me bigtime—so often, after a hard day or a tough accomplishment, or even just the weekend, I feel that to reward myself I should stop taking care of myself and eat something epic, have a drink, or skip things such as my yoga practice…
None of these things actually make me feel good, or fulfill the purpose of a reward: to replace something that was given.
Of course, treats and lazy days have their purpose, but as a reward for a stressful time, they do nothing but drag us down further.
Rewards are supposed to fill up the tank, yet we can easily fall into a trap of rewarding ourselves in ways that actually make us feel worse.
Why do we do this? Do we feel we don’t deserve to give ourselves the love of caring for ourselves to this extent?
We’ve been taught that the time we might spend truly treating ourselves is a luxury—perhaps even selfish.
We are as only as good to the world as we are to ourselves. We cannot give and give without receiving—without nourishing ourselves.
The world gets busy, I know so many have families and responsibilities beyond belief—but I’m convinced that even in the hectic world we live in, there are times we can actually reward ourselves, if we are willing to take some energy away from something that is not serving us.
Its amazing how easily something frivolous can take up that 30 minutes you could use to uplift yourself.
Just taking away the “rewards” that actually weigh you down is a reward in itself!
What, then, are true rewards? Bubble baths, foot massages, a favorite healthy meal, time in nature, yoga, writing, or reading a good book are some of mine…and, yes they can be the hardest to give myself when I’m stressed.
But…the more overwhelmed you feel, the more amazing even the smallest rewards feel—go figure! Even a simple, leisurely shower can feel like a day at the spa.
Those activities that relax you, uplift you and recharge you—those are true rewards.
Those things you would love to do “if you had more time”, those are true rewards.
We’re in some rough habits, and just like any we have to retrain ourselves to treat ourselves like we matter. Because, we do.