We cannot change fear, but we can alter our response to it.
I feel overwhelmed by my ambitions, often—when this happens I usually lay face-down and stick my face in a pillow. At some point I decide to breathe through it—inhale, exhale, repeat—it calms me a bit and I can think more clearly.
In the past what used to rise up from these time-outs were all the external reasons I was struggling, the past circumstances that were holding me back, whether that be my own mistakes or times of unawareness. The point is: I pointed outward—and in the process I defined my own limitations.
When we consciously—or unconsciously agree to accept the external as limiting us and continually reinforce that, we start to believe that we are indeed limited, a victim. Our “limitations” are the excuses we’ve given ourselves. An easy habit to form, a sneaky one to break.
I’m sitting up from these face-down-in-the-pillow moments quicker now, mainly because I’m starting to challenge my excuses; I’m not cutting myself the same slack; I’m recognizing that I am entirely responsible and 110% accountable for my destiny. I am limitless, you are limitless, we are limitless.
We will always fear the unknown, and that is exactly what lies beyond the limits we define for ourselves. We may not be able to eliminate this fear, it is, after all a long-standing part of our human nature, but we can change how we handle it; we can recognize it for what it is: ours.
Our fear, our limitations, our anxieties—they are ours, and thus it is only us who can transform our response to them.
Personal responsibility is the terrifying and paradoxical gateway to freedom. Taking it upon ourselves to reach for greatness—no excuses—is so vulnerable (a synonym for strong). Letting go of our self-pity in exchange for self-motivation is scary; so long as we allow ourselves to feel sorry for ourselves, we benefit—making excuses for ourselves to stay exactly where we are, and in turn, justifying standing still.
I’m accepting that this life is mineminemine to make, break, dance upon and transform.
There is not failure, only feedback. To stand still, to quit is the only true way to fail.
It’s all my responsibility, it is in my power, I create my own possibilities. Terrifying, yet true—scary, yet filled to the brim with potential.
I’m clearing blame, I’m clearing the illusions that I am not in the driver’s seat.
And what happens in this clarity of taking responsibility for the whole shebang?
I stand up, I climb up again, I move forward—I feel the frustration in a new way. What was once a pity-party is now an internal memo which sticks with me, so long as I allow it to. As I feel it’s weight on my shoulders I come closer to fully allowing it to move me closer to my greatness.